Save me, I am swallowed by the guilt of this.

My boss is out for the rest of the day, so I might as well take this time to write.

I realize that apologies have become regular prologues in my entry, and I am not one to break tradition (ha!). But it kind of feels like the cosmos is out to get me with this whole updating thing.

A few weeks ago, I made myself a Lift.do account to keep myself accountable for three things: (1) writing, (2) Japanese review, and (3) exercise. I figure seeing a visual output of my goals was going to make me more productive.

Boy was I ever so wrong!

First off, I was feeling off with random bouts of sickness that even I cannot understand. Nothing serious, but enough to incapacitate me and leave me lazy. Second, the city where I work has passed a most moronic bus ban that has left me frustrated and confused for a week. Lastly, I gravely underestimated the workload I had for July and August.

Thus, upon getting home, being productive becomes the last thing on my mind. I spend my evenings playing Candy Crush or Theaterythm, or reading random articles. I'm not even advancing on my book goal!

I guess this is a special sort of Murphy's Law constructed for I and I alone. It postulates: "The feeling of productivity brings about factors out of your control that will render you useless and unmotivated." It's like how I know I'm about to get my period because I suddenly get the urge to exercise, only to cancel all plans while writhing on the floor with cramps.

So what's the point of this whole entry? Well, I just wanted to remind myself that I have a blog that I promised I'd commit to once upon a time. The entries will take a while, but at least I'm beginning to kick myself in the arse instead of constantly forgiving myself. I might write a bit about a concert experience (so I can finally come to terms with the fact that it's done), but more importantly I'm back and I hope I stay.

Now I hope this stupid allergy stuffs itself and lets me write in peace.

May-hem! May-hem!

This morning I was sipping my morning coffee, contemplating life and thinking "Oh, I don't have much to do today..."

Today, June 30.

A.k.a. the very last day of June.

For some reason I panicked and thought of this blog and how I promised myself to write two entries this June about my monthly reads. Which was strange. seeing as I have the tendency to forgive myself and allow late entries as often as I can. But what the hey, I did say I didn't have much to do today, so I guess I better put the writing gears to use and write.

I didn't actually read a lot last May for some reason. Birthday blues, I guess. But at least I managed to read three books!

April Books!

Hello folks!

I know I mentioned here some time ago that I was going to have to write two entries for my April and May books. I guess I better begin now, since June is ending in a week! Can you believe that? I felt like June 1 was just yesterday, but now it's June 24.

Recently, I haven't had the time to write because I feel like I get sick every week. One week I was down with a bad allergy and the next week I had coughs that wouldn't stop. Whenever I get thoughts of updating, some random virus suddenly attacks. The weather's not helping my case as well. But now that I am relatively well, you are getting a post.

Also I mentioned forever ago that this blog was going to get an overhaul, but obviously that's going to have to go into the back burner. Wait until I get my life together.

Onwards to the books!

[book post] March-ing in my Monthly Reads

Lame pun! I'm sorry for that, I couldn't resist.

By the way, I wrote this entry WAY BACK MARCH and it is now *drum roll please* JUNE! Yay me! Hahaha. Well, an entry is an entry. That means I'm going to do double time for my April and May reads.

Anyway, March comes rolling around and I finished five books! What a miracle! I have just finished my 16th book, but by April last year I was only up to 10 books. I don't know why I'm reading so much. I guess this is what happens when your iPod gets stolen? I stopped playing so many games and just read, which admittedly is a lot more beneficial to my intellectual capacity and development.

I am, however, developing the unfortunate habit of buying new books and finishing them before I finish the books I've bought before. Some books I've bought years ago are still in my bookshelf collecting dust. Ugh. I do hope I get around to reading the books I've bought before instead of going out and buying more books.

That said, let's proceed to my March reads!

All summaries taken from Goodreads (except the last one which I took from Google Books because the GR one was nonsense).

day 30 | my favorite book of all time. OF ALL TIME!

As consistent as always, I am late to the party! Yay me!

Well, I severely underestimated the work I had to put in for Thursday and Friday. I got home late both days and I was extra tired on Friday because I had to keep running up and down the stairs. BUT HEY. I guess it's finally time to end this book challenge!

Day 30 - Your favorite book of all time.

I believe I am justified in taking so long to write this entry. No I'm not. But it's just so fucking difficult thinking about your ALL-TIME favorite book! At this point in my life I have read up to quite possibly 300 books (not counting required reading and anthologies), and now I have to pick ONE? Just ONE?

All of the books I have read take up special places in my heart, some spaces more prominent than others but I love them all the same. So it's really hard for me to pick just one! It's like making someone choose their favorite child! So I think I'll write about the book that started it all:

day 29 | 'cause i'm hipster like that

I almost forgot the reason why I opened this computer in the first place. Oh well! I'm getting to it now!

I can't believe I only have two more days with this book challenge! I really wanted to devote more time in writing these blog entries; unfortunately, I really do not have all the time and resources to make a proper blog post. I am way too effing busy at work, and when I finally get home the only thing I want to do is curl up into a ball and sleep. Then I wake up and repeat the cycle all over again. Woe. Hopefully the work dwindles down in the coming months.

That said, I shall go on with my entry.

Day 29 - A book everyone hated but you liked

I seriously can't think of an answer to this! Usually when people hate a book, that's a good sign that I probably shouldn't read it. I take people's advice on books seriously, lol. Sooooo let's pick a book that people are meh about but I liked enough:

Graceling by Kristin Cashore.

I just recently saw on a forum that a lot of people were apparently bored by the book. I really liked it though! I love Katsa and Po, the setting, and the plot. Also, I love how there's finally a book that recognizes the fact that some girls don't want to get married. Oh well, different strokes I guess.

Tomorrow shall be my final entry for this book challenge! Will I be able to write it or not? Find out, mwahahha.

Day 30 - Your favorite book of all time

day 28 | ALL THE RAGE.

*meditative breath*

So. I just got home from work. And I mean I JUST GOT HOME FROM WORK. What time is it? 9:17 PM. What time should I have been home? 7:40 PM. That's an hour ago.

It took me more than an hour to get to the bus terminal when it should have taken me only 30 minutes! For some fucking reason, the roads were really congested, so the jeep I was riding took an alternate route. Bright fucking idea, because everybody else thought the same thing! Now the alternate route took so fucking long, and we had to run into a Flores de Mayo procession. Whoever you are, what a bright fucking idea to hold a Flores de Mayo AT NIGHT on a WEEKDAY, at a BUSY STREET. Gosh darnit. And I almost fell off the jeep because the driver was being an IDIOT and continued to drive even though it was fucking obvious that a bunch of us were getting off the jeep.

Oh, but that's not all! I walked all the way to the bus terminal, and when I finally got on, the bus took the long route home. Like, seriously? You are obviously aware that the traffic situation is mental out there, but you chose to take the long route home?

PLUS, I had to sit next to the most kuuki yomenai person in the history of EVER. I have this anxiety when someone in the bus sits beside me and there are a fuckton of free seats all around. I just get soooooooooooo annoyed and frustrated! And it was totally showing in the way I was zipping my bags and massaging my forehead. But the idiot still was not getting it at all. I had to double my bitchiness before he even got the message.

PLUS PLUS, when I got home (finally!), I am greeted by a banshee who does not understand how fucking stressful my night was and proceeded to scream about how much she needed to get her presentation done, when in fact my sister is the one making the presentations and all she was doing was screaming about her presentation. How much more stressed would you fucking be if your computer-illiterate ass was the one doing this presentation?

GOD DAMMIT I AM PEESED.

Now that that's over, it's time to get on with the book challenge, which I honestly am not up to right now. But anyway, I'm already here and I might as well type something.

Day 28 - Favorite title

days 22 - 27 | BOOK CHALLENGE SPREEEEEEEEEE.

Oh freaking elephants.

I had no idea that I was so behind on entries! Gosh darnit. But I have totally valid reasons though. This week was pretty busy (in the sense that my to-do list was longer than the Nile). Also, last Saturday was mah burfday and yesterday was my cousin's birthday PLUS I went to a Flores de Mayo procession. Blogging was just not an option.

But hey, I have a significant amount of free time today! The whole day! What an amazing thing! So I shall spend it filling up the blog challenge. Today, I challenge myself to make this as succinct as possible because I have a lot of entries to write.

Off we go!

day 21 | life imitating art and vice versa + a bit of childhood regression

Sigh. Once again, work piled up and my tasks for the week barely fit in a notepad. Thus, having no time to write a blog post during work breaks. I should have foreseen this coming! Then maybe I wouldn't have spent half of an entire fucking day playing Sims 3.

Out of sheer boredom I made a Sim, aiming to be a doctor. For some reason I was really obsessed with her getting her lifetime wish (thus spending 5 - 9 PM madly making her play chess). At one point my sister came to observe my game and commented on how alone the girl was. "Ang lungkot-lungkot naman niya! Bigyan mo na ng asawa! (She looks so sad! Give her a husband!)" she said.

"Career before love!!!!" I screamed, and she guffawed.

Y'know I think this Sim is going to be me when I grow up, haha. Not that I ever want to become a doctor. But I didn't realize I was living vicariously through this Sim, being successful and having fun "socializing", until my sister commented on it.

She did look pretty lonely though, so I found her a boyfriend. Something I'm not doing for myself in this lifetime XD

Now, onto the book challenge! Hey look, I only have 10 entries left!

Day 21 - Favorite book from your childhood

day 20 | love is all around.

It's such a boring Monday morning.

I guess we were all really tired from yesterday's events. We had a procession for Flores de Mayo and it was exhausting. Running around for an hour and a half trying not to trip over children and taking photographs. Urgh. It was fun though, but I'm glad it only comes once a year haha.

Let me just share a photograph I took yesterday of our two "tenants"! They're a mother and daughter pair and they ham it up pretty well for the camera. Aren't they adorbs?

I realize I made a promise to myself to make a weekly photodiary, and though I have been doing pretty well with that, my problem is I don't really like sharing my personal life through a public platform. Lol. So I will resign myself to take more pictures of animals and inanimate objects for this blog.

Anyway, onto the blogging challenge!

Day 20 - Favorite romance book

day 17, 18, and 19 | apologies in order

BEEP BEEP BEEP Here comes the failboat! 

Urgh. I really need to get better at this whole updating thing! To be fair, I had a busy day last Friday, and I spent yesterday out with my friends for a joint birthday celebration. Both days had me wonky by nightfall. It looks like it's going to be a busy week too, so I know I'm bound to miss a day or two this week again.

ANYWAY let's get on to it. This is going to be a really short entry because I am so lazy it's criminal.

day 15 and 16 | guys and dolls, gather round

I thought I wasn't going to be busy today. FAT CHANCE. Now I finally have some free time, so I'll use it to type up a quick entry.

Awww man, I really want to dedicate more time to these entries! But I can never get enough typing time at home, so I have to sneak it in during lunch breaks or work breaks. Ugh. Maybe next time I'll try writing up some stuff on my phone and try to save time.

Anyway! I combined the entries for day 15 and 16 in one entry because they're related. I think it's easier to talk about my favorite characters in one go than dedicating separte entries for the males and females. 

As you might know by now, I like cheating with this entry and providing more answers than necessary, so you will expect THREE characters! 

I promise I'll keep this as short as I can.

Day 15 - Favorite male character and Day 16 - Favorite female character

day 13 and 14 | the wordsmiths and their crafts + a rant of a democratic cynic

This entry has been three days in the making, yet I can't seem to really get into it and write.

I blame the elections.

Last May 13 was my second time participating in my country's elections. To be honest, I was a bit excited! I saw it as an opportunity for change and improvement. A lot of people in my social media accounts seem to be getting into the spirit as well, promoting the candidates who they think deserve a spot in the senatorial roster. I thought, "Wow, people are really getting into the spirit of things!" As I stood in line to exercise my right as a democratic citizen, I believed in a change. I believed in progress.

But everything changed when the Fire Nation attacked.

Sadly, idealism will get you nowhere, and as the recent results will tell you, my country still has a long, long way to go in terms of "voting wisely."

I seriously didn't understand the situation. I felt like everybody knew who to vote for, and who NOT to vote for, yet everything still went downhill.

Then my father said, "Well, that's just how it is. Especially the urban poor, they'll vote for whoever gave them money or gives them feeding programs or hands out bags of groceries."

And that just sucks. It sucks that it's not even a matter of information dissemination anymore, it all boils down to who gives short-term solutions (money, groceries), not people who are capable of pushing for bills that will help the Filipinos for generations to come. It sucks that people would vote for a candidate because s/he entertained them with a song-and-dance number during the motorcade. It sucks that people who come from the same family as an esteemed politician will get voted because hey, "baka namana nya yung galing ng tatay/nanay/kapatid/lola/lolo nya."

I can sit here and rant all I fucking want, but at the end of the day, these are who the "people" voted for. I'm just one person who's very dissatisfied with the results. All I can do now is hope and pray that these elected people would do their gosh-darn best to make this country a better place.

And now let's get to my book entry!

Day 13 - Your favorite writer and Day 14 - Favorite book of your favorite writer

I know that this entry is a day late, but that's cause I wanted to combine the two topics together.

I'm kind of annoyed at this question, actually! Way down Day 30, the question is "your favorite book of all time" but obviously, if I had favorite book EVER, I'd probably really like the author too right? Ugh. But no matter, I'll still try to not repeat a book while doing this challenge.

Day 12 | now you're just a book that i used to love

Lol at my title.

Anyway, before I get to my entry, let me greet the mothers a Happy Mother's Day! 

Coincidentally it is also my twin cat's birthday today! Happy Birthday Oya! 

It may be mother's day but my mom was definitely not in a celebratory mood, as she spent at least half of the day asleep. It prompted me to say "Happy Mother's Day wooohooo party people" in a really bored tone, flailing my arms. At least my sister was amused.

As we already had our fill of cake and pasta, it's time for me to write, write, write!

Day 12 - A book you used to love but don’t anymore

Aww man, what kind of question is this? I'm not the kind of person who just suddenly hates something I love because I grew up or whatever. Especially when it comes to books. So I think I'll discuss a book that I thought was the shit when I was younger, but looking at it now, it's not as good as I made it out to be. And that book is...

day 11 | brace yourself for immense loathing below

I have an hour to write this blog entry if I want to remain faithful to my "one blog entry a day rule." Challenge accepted! Damn, I didn't realize it was already 11 PM because I slept like a log during the bus ride home.

I was planning on doing this during my lunch break at work, but I didn't get the time at all. I think I underestimated my workload for this month by a mile. Now I can't work properly because I'm thinking "Am I prioritizing the right thing? Should I have done this later?" which leads to me not working, which leads to work not being done, which leads to work piling up. Argh! If I could only learn how to execute Kage Bunshin!

Well, let's forget about that for a while! Bring out the next entry!

Day 11 - A book you hate(d)

Y'know I just realized these questions are a bit repetitive. Or at least my answers for these questions will tend to be repetitive. Serves me right for not reading all the questions when I first encountered them! Anyhoo, I will try my best to not repeat any of my answers for this challenge.

See the little modification I made on today's question? It's cause I still hate this book, haha. So without further ado...

day 10 | something old

Congratulate me! I reached day 10 of this challenge! 

Well to be honest, I had every intent of finishing this challenge anyway, but I'm having difficulties with the Internet connection and the inspiration. So I think "congratulations" are in order! *throws confetti for herself*

Ehem. Anyway, I think I'll trying doing the illustrations for this challenge tomorrow, when there's not much to do.

This particular entry will be an exercise on time restraint, as I have only 15 minutes before I get out of work. So let's begin!

Day 10 - Favorite classic book

I am a fan of classic books. A lot of people deem them boring and would not even waste an ounce of effort reading the blurbs. I, on the other hand, adore classics. I think if something's a classic, it's bound to be good if it can stand the test of time, right? I try to read as many classics as I can. 

Because I am indecisive once again, I shall pick THREE books! Three seems to be my magic number for this challenge!

1. The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde.

I adore Oscar Wilde's writing, ever since we had to read The Happy Prince for my high school English class. I stumbled upon a collection of his short stories and I wanted more! So naturally, I picked up this novel and of course, fell in love with it. There's just something about Wilde's prose and narration that makes you feel like you're part of a fantasy. I remember reading this novel from cover to cover in one day, because it was that interesting! Strangely, I've yet to watch the movie adaptation of this novel, but I'm sure I'll get to it soon.

2. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen.

Welp, I know, typical answer. But I included it on the list because it's one of the few romances that I truly like! It's difficult for me to get into romance, but for some reason this really pulled me it. The beautiful movie was also a factor. I like relationships like Lizzie Bennet's and Mr. Darcy's because I have an equality kink and I don't like romances where they're making out like crazy every other chapter. I've yet to read another Austen novel, but eventually I'd like to read all of them!

3. The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett.

The inclusion of this novel in my list is a bit of a stretch, but I think it counts as a classic, don't you think? This was one of my first "serious" novels as a child, wherein the language wasn't so simple, the plot was a lot longer, and it was not episodic but linear. I read this because I've been a fan of the many movie versions of the story, and I thought reading it would be fun. Then I started re-reading it forever because it was my favorite novel as a child. A lot of people in my family also like telling me that I remind them of Mary Lennox because I was such a cross child. Maybe that's why I liked this novel so much.

And I finished this entry in record time! Yay me! See you again on the next days to come!

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Day 11 - A book you hated
Day 12 - A book you used to love but don’t anymore
Day 13 - Your favorite writer
Day 14 - Favorite book of your favorite writer
Day 15 - Favorite male character
Day 16 - Favorite female character
Day 17 - Favorite quote from your favorite book
Day 18 - A book that disappointed you
Day 19 - Favorite book turned into a movie
Day 20 - Favorite romance book
Day 21 - Favorite book from your childhood
Day 22 - Favorite book you own
Day 23 - A book you wanted to read for a long time but still haven’t
Day 24 - A book that you wish more people would’ve read
Day 25 - A character who you can relate to the most
Day 26 - A book that changed your opinion about something
Day 27 - The most surprising plot twist or ending
Day 28 - Favorite title
Day 29 - A book everyone hated but you liked
Day 30 - Your favorite book of all time

day 9 | when school reading gives you jewels

I'm feeling better today, but still not completely in shape. Ugh. Should I have gone to work today? I rather would have not, but c'est la vie -- a penniless creature such as myself needs to go to work for the monies.

Ugh.

Anyway, let's discuss the book for day 9! Honestly, I am finding it hard to answer this question because I don't really pick up books without at least being intrigued by the summary. Will you seriously pick up a book with the initial thought of "this sucks"? So I decided to talk about a book that I had to read for school. Because seriously, no student thinks "fun!" when they're assigned to read a book.

Day 09 - A book you thought you wouldn’t like but ended up loving

Crime and Punishment by Fyodr Dostoyevsky

We had to read this book for my world literature class, and of course I wasn't that thrilled about it. I mean, the blurb was OK, but it didn't reel me in (especially since I was a science fiction, swashbuckling action fan!). But what the hey, it's not like I could protest and refuse to read the book. I could, in theory, but the most probable end result would have been my expulsion from that class. So I grudgingly read the book, armed with Spark Notes.

To be honest I was surprised that I actually liked it! I found myself really excited and nervous when Raskolnikov was plotting to kill the money-lender. And even though I knew what he did was wrong, for some reason I wanted him to be saved. But as such, justice must be served and the moral lesson is "two wrongs don't make a right."

I've been meaning to read this book again for sometime now, since I was reading it in a certain time constraint. I think I'll read "The Brothers Karamazov" first.

This entry has been really short! What a record! Well, until the next book!

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Day 10 - Favorite classic book
Day 11 - A book you hated
Day 12 - A book you used to love but don’t anymore
Day 13 - Your favorite writer
Day 14 - Favorite book of your favorite writer
Day 15 - Favorite male character
Day 16 - Favorite female character
Day 17 - Favorite quote from your favorite book
Day 18 - A book that disappointed you
Day 19 - Favorite book turned into a movie
Day 20 - Favorite romance book
Day 21 - Favorite book from your childhood
Day 22 - Favorite book you own
Day 23 - A book you wanted to read for a long time but still haven’t
Day 24 - A book that you wish more people would’ve read
Day 25 - A character who you can relate to the most
Day 26 - A book that changed your opinion about something
Day 27 - The most surprising plot twist or ending
Day 28 - Favorite title
Day 29 - A book everyone hated but you liked
Day 30 - Your favorite book of all time

day 8 | the fault in this book

I feel horrible.

My stomach is aching and my kneecap is hurting. Earlier, I was breaking into a fever. What in the world did I do to deserve this? I feel like dying. Hopefully writing will ease my mind a bit.]

Let's talk about the most overrated book! I know that people are going to be mad at me for writing about this, because it's a book that a lot of people really enjoyed. So I'll just disclaim beforehand that this is all my opinion and I am not judging you for liking this particular book, it just didn't do it for me and did not live up to my expectations.

Without further ado, let us discuss...

Day 08 - Most Overrated Book

days 5, 6, and 7 | hodge-podge!

WELL SNAP.

I failed to update for two whole days! But I have an actual excuse! The Internet connection at home is still a nightmare, and I was out for the whole Monday. By the time I got home I was dying from exhaustion. I seriously wanted to write something, but I was soooooo tired. Ugh.

Anyhoo! Now I am here and I shall write, write, write! Last week I said something stupid about doing illustrations, and I think that'll take a backseat for a while. Obviously I can't do it with this entry. So let's just say by the tenth entry, I'll probably do it, to commemorate me sticking to something for once.

Onwards we go!

Day 5 - A book that makes you happy.

book challenge day 3 | until the next episode

Welcome to Day 3 and 4 of my book challenge!

I actually had half of my Day 3 entry written up yesterday, but as luck would have it, my home Internet connection was being wonky as heck. Sigh. So I'm going to combine the entries for Day 3 and 4. It's a good thing the two questions are connected!

Also, I've been thinking of doing something different with this challenge. Since my entries are looking so blah and imageless, I think I wanna try illustrating my answers. I know this idea is probably going to crash and burn, given my history of brilliant ideas that never seem to reach resolution, but what the heck! It's not a sin to make and break promises, haha! I might try it with my entries for next week.

That said, let's get on to our next entry...

Day 03 - Your favorite series and 

Day 04 - Your favorite book from your favorite series

By now, I think you know that I'm going to cheat again and name more books than is required. Why? Because I'm indecisive like that!

To be honest, I'm not really a fan of trilogies and books that come in a series. I just hate having to wait! I have a tendency to pick up completed series or stand-alone novels, simply because I am consumed with such giddiness and impatience when waiting for the next book. I also have a tendency to obsessively marathon-read books when I want to find out what happens next, to the point of staying up all night just reading or buying the next book (and does not happen to be in my budget). But I still read a lot of series books 'cause I never learn my lesson.

That said, I am going to name (once again) three series!

book challenge day 2 | reading and reading and reading

I am bored (shh), so to prevent myself from falling face-first on top of my desk, I will write day 2 of this book challenge!

Day 02 - A book that you’ve read more than 3 times

Man, I got stumped again! The truth is, I was a big re-reader when I was younger for the very simple reason that I didn't have enough books! Books were a luxury to me. I had tons of hand-me-down books from my uncle, but once I finished all of them, I had to wait for special occasions before I could buy a new book. Of course, when I got older I blew all my savings in books, no occasion needed. So I had a bit of a hard time coming up with just one book. 

Which is why I'm writing down three! Mwahahaha!

Another Apology + A Book Challenge!

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

I AM AN IDIOT.

Remember almost a month ago how I made an apology about not writing in this blog? Well, I AM APOLOGIZING AGAIN. Because I am an inexcusable idiot!

See, this time I don't even have a reason for not writing. I'm just an idiot who has random bouts of depression and general discontent with life. And I hate it! I think it's because I'm getting really burnt out at work, causing me to go home and temporarily convert to an amoeba. I'm not even reading as much, which is definitely a surprise!

I've also been having a lot of bouts of just general reflection and thinking, "what's the fucking point?" So what if I have a blog and I don't update it? So what if I'm unproductive -- not everybody can be the next Steve Jobs.

And then I finally kicked myself in the proverbial arse and said, "YOU should care about your life."

So yeah, here's me caring and trying to get back in the writing groove again.

I actually had my March books lined up AGES ago, but I never got around to finishing it. I swear, I'll put it up sometime this week. My April reads will be easier because I only read two books :(

AND! As a way to kick in the month of May, I am doing a 30 Day Book Challenge! This month, I am challenging myself to write about books that I've read and all that jazz, one entry per day! I really hope I accomplish this, I think it pressures me more when I have to go through a timed challenge.

Onto the first challenge:

Day 01 - Best book you read last year 

A Visit to the Owl Burrow

*cricket chirping, tumbleweed rolling*

Uh, hello.

I posted here almost a month ago. That has got to be a personal record! In retrospect, I've never really meant to abandon this blog, but here's why I never got around to writing anything.

First, I was dealing with a bit of sickness that made breathing a bit difficult and delicate, so I didn't want to spend time making a blog post because that requires sitting up. Kill me, I know. I'm doing better now and I hope it keeps up, but given my track record with luck nowadays, I'm not looking at the bright side of things. On the bright side, being sick made me take better care of myself and my diet, so it's not entirely a downer.

And secondly, I've been having thoughts about reconstructing this blog. I know I said before that this blog was going to be more art-oriented, but I'm having a difficult time producing art (I will talk about this further in another entry). Meanwhile, I'm really getting into finishing my giant pile of books and my to-read list is ever expanding. Also, my last two entries have been about my monthly reads (March's entry is coming up!) and I think I quite like writing about books. I have a lot of themes and issues that I also want to explore through writing.

So here's what's going on: I'm making The Patchwork Owl a more book-centered blog. I'm going to try and produce art with a theme (book characters and quotes) so I get more motivated. I might also sneak in some photodiaries, but most of this blog is going to be about books.

Someone poke me if I start being an idiot and not posting again!

February Books!

Hello to my February reads!

February was a pretty good reading month for me. My first book started out really slow, but once I picked up the next books, I just went through them like hotcakes. My bus rides have just become extra boring, I guess.

All summaries from these books are taken from GoodReads, because I'm too lazy and inept to make summaries.

Without further ado, here are my February reads!

January Books!

Welcome to my MONTHLY READS post!

I made a promise to myself in a previous entry that I was going to read an average of 3 books per month this 2013. I've kept track of the here and will try to write about them at the end of the month.

January was a pretty good reading month for me. I read two extra long books this month, but I still managed to read 4 books! Take a look at some of my January reads:

photodiary | neko nikki 01

Kitten! What're you looking at??

Obviously, I love cats. And I love taking pictures of them. I actually have a rather special talent with stray cats. Usually when I call out to them, they turn to look at me for a snap shot. When I put down the camera, they walk away. Isn't that cool? .... no? Whatever, I think it's cool.

Near my workplace, there are a lot of stray cats. I like taking pictures of them when I'm done with events.

random rambling monday | crawling towards the sun

I almost forgot that it's a Monday today.

Which means: time for more meaningless ramblings from a bored idiot!

-- To begin this week, I tried following along the exercise video above. It was so. effing. tiring. My legs were screaming bloody murder when I was done! I think this is a pretty good indication that I'm severely out of shape! I've never been athletic or even a physical sort of person, but I always made time to at least walk around campus during my university days. But after this workout I was positively winded! I'm glad I found a really good fitness channel though. I don't want to look like a Victoria's Secret model ('cause that is the most impossible of goals!), but I'd like to be less flabby and more active.

photodiary || a lazy, sunny day for cats and dogs

Hello Wifi! (don't ask the origins of her name)

I recall a few entries ago, wherein I boldly declared that I would make a weekly photo diary. Well, it's only the middle of February but I'm afraid I must take my ambitions down a notch.

Firstly, I'm working with a really cheap camera that has a loser for a shutter and is primarily an underwater camera. Next, I'm dealing with quite a lot of time constraints that prevent me from making a full-blown post. Finally, I realized my life isn't really that interesting that I could compile a sizeable amount of photos for a photo diary every week. 

I think I'm going to step back and reduce it to a twice a month sort of thing. Minimum of one photo diary per  month. The important thing is I keep on practicing my photography as I go by.

So today me and my sister went out for a walk under the scorching sun, because we're idiots like that. Example of being idiots:

Sis: Ate wala akong dalang cellphone (I don't have a cellphone with me)
Me: Di bale, ako din. (Don't worry, me neither)

It was super hot and not really the best time for walking. All the cats and dogs around the neighborhood were definitely feeling the heat! 

I need to mention it was SO HOT and the sun was up really high that I couldn't even see the LCD of my camera properly. It was a lot like shooting with an old school disposable camera, as I only saw the shots properly when I got home. 

grateful, excited, inspired, challenged, amazed, and curious

Happy Valentine's Day from my homeboy, Enjolras!

To be honest, I'm not really big on Valentine's. Not because of bitterness, but it's more like, "what's the goddamn point?" I'm not a sentimental person to begin with, so I don't really see the point of dedicating one day to mushiness and adding to the profits of chocolate companies everywhere.

Here's a paraphrased/modified version of M. Bison's most famous quote from legendary (loltastic) Street Fighter movie:

For you, Valentine's Day was the most important day of your life. But for me... it was Thursday.

But don't mind me, enjoy your Valentine's as much as you wish! No significant other? Have a Galentine's instead, by commiserating with other single girls. I don't know if a Guylentine's exists, but who says you can't be the first?

In the meantime, I'm going to answer a mini-blogging challenge from Wanderrgirl as part of my Valentine afternoon.

Random Rambling Monday | Cats and fats

In my former LiveJournal, I used to do this thing called Random Rambling Monday. It was a way for me to kick into gear and just write, no pretenses, no pressure, no sense. I'm going to try and revive that in this blog. So once a week,  you can expect the random ramblings of a fool. Fun!

I'm gonna write an entry about things that are too short to dedicate a blog entry to, but too long to be tweeted.

Spilling the Beans on my Greatest Fear

Today, let's talk fears and courage.

I actually had a bit of a hard time starting with this entry, because I felt like my fear is not that scary compared to other people. I thought that I'd just look like I was whining. However, I think fear is an arbitrary notion and I think I have a right to fear what I want to regardless of judgement. So let's get on with it.

To be honest, I'm not much of a scaredy-cat. I don't easily get scared with horror movies or ghost stories, or scary rides or big dogs (as long as they're on a leash, haha). I'm pretty OK with most scary situations.

But here's the catch: I am deathly afraid of talking to people. 

You probably don't think it sounds so bad: we all have our moments of clamming up when socializing, right? But I take this issue to a crippling degree. When I was in 3rd grade, I remember almost crying because I didn't want to talk to the lunch lady and buy lunch. I remember putting off a phone call at least 5 times because I didn't want to talk on the phone. I remember crying during Foundation Day because I didn't speak up when they were handing out our uniforms, and a girl who was absent the day before took mine, therefore I didn't get to be in the celebration. That's how scared I am of human interaction!

Granted, I am a lot better now than the blubbering, snivelly mess that I was in the fourth grade, but I still have miles to go when it comes to proper human interaction.

My journey towards proper social interaction is a long and tedious one, but I think the event that finally pushed me over the edge and made me embrace my fear is my speech communications class in college.

A bit of random musing and a look inside my bag

I haven't posted in a while because I took a bit of time off to think about this blog and what I really want to do with it.

First things first, the name "Patchwork Owl". I picked out this name because I wanted it to contain a lot of different things (hence, "patchwork") and aside from cats, I feel like owls are my symbol. Hence, the birth of the name. But upon reflection, I feel like it sounds more like an arts and crafts shop than a random art blog. I don't really want to change the name, but I don't know how to make it sound like more of a personal blog.

Another thing I've been pondering on is the blog content. I made a lot of promises to myself while writing my kick-off post for the year, and a lot of them involved some sort of documentation in this blog. My dilemma is: how do I keep my promises to myself while keeping this blog cohesive and uncluttered?

I hope I can give answers to these questions in due time.

Meanwhile, I needed some motivation to clean out my bag while watching Natsume Yuujinchou (a series that I might write about sometime!), so I decided to do the What's in my Bag tag and show you my bag's contents.

This is the Year I Kick My Own Ass: Part 2

Ready, get set... GO FOR AN AWESOME YEAR!

 Welcome to Part 2 of my yearly goal-setting post!

I decided to make two separate entries so that you people don't have to sift through every single one of my goals. I didn't want to omit them though, because these are things that I really need and want to do. These are also goals that are either standard in every year, or goals that need to be done.

Also, I've included a section called "notes to self". I mentioned in my previous entry that I've always made goals that weren't tangible or measurable, so I didn't know how to evaluate my success. Thus, I'm not listing them down as "goals" per se, but rather tidbits of advice that I will try to keep in mind to govern me towards a better 2013.

Who says 13 has to be bad luck? With these goals, I'm gonna try and make 2013 awesome.

This is the Year I Kick My Own Ass: New Year Goals Part 1

Hooray 2013!

FOREWORD: I wrote this entry and its skeletal contents a few days ago as a draft, after putting off my yearly goal entry for the longest time. Lo and behold, our blogging challenge for this week is "5 things I dare myself to do in 2013!" It's like I have ESPN or something. Now onward to the entry. A word of warning: it gets pretty long. 

Everybody approaches the coming of a new year with different levels of enthusiasm and effort. There are some people who make the standard goals like "lose more weight" or "travel more" just to say that they made a goal. Some people forego the resolution-making all together under the excuse of "Resolutions are meant to be broken anyway." And some people tackle this goal-setting process with an ardor rivaled by the determination of people lining up the Apple store to get an iPhone 5.

I used to be a lazy goal setter. I set random goals that (1) are super generic and make no sense, (2) have no means of measure and (3) don't get fulfilled at all in the span of 365 days. Disappointment ensues and more halfhearted goals followed.

Thankfully, I've changed my goal-setting personality by making goals that are actually tangible and quantifiable. Now I look forward to listing my goals for the coming year!

It took me a while to write this entry because I wanted to make my goals a bit more cohesive and thematic, and also wanted to avoid pitfalls like having way too many goals that don't get at all fulfilled (it happened last year, cue my cringing!). So this year, I decided to unify my goals with the theme NOUVEAU. I don't use want to use "new," I want to sound fancy schmancy. This year (aside from my standard goals) I'm going to try and do things that I've never done before (which fits so well with our current blogging challenge prompt!).

Onward to le goals!

The Happy Jar Chronicles

(Image from bitsofwisdom.org)

I will readily admit that one of my worst traits is my negativity. I'm going to blame my father for this because he's where I got my road rage and general anger from. My sister always says that I should never be allowed to drive, lest I run over someone on purpose. General angst and my paranoid tendencies don't help at all in my almost daily tirade at things and people who put a dent on my day.

Last year, however, I went through a seriously upsetting discussion with a (now former) friend, and it almost felt like I was going through a panic attack. I had difficulty breathing, my eyes were clouding over, and my fingers were so cramped from typing so fast. I calmed down after I took a step back and took some deep breaths. And then I said to myself -- "Wait a second, are you going to let your anger be more powerful than you?"

Let’s talk about my closer-to-reality job

When people ask me about my “dream job,” I’d say in a heartbeat: Gundam pilot. Why? Because as far as dreams go, it’s the most impossible. For one, I’d have to wait until After Colony 195, which is probably five centuries from now. Also, I don’t possess the athletic and mental capabilities of Heero Yuy, my childhood hero. Finally, it’s not nice to wish for an all-out global war just so I get the chance to fly around in a giant mobile suit.

So let’s talk about a job that I call my closer-to-reality job.

My Year in Books

Image from yourebeautiful.tumblr.com

Let me just say this: the phrase "I love books" is a humongous understatement when applied to me.

I don't think I can make it out of the week without beginning a book. Not a lot of people share my excitement for the coven that is Book Sale. Whenever I go there, I can't seem to make it out without toting at least one book. Sometimes books that I'm not so crazy about. I just feel so sad for such unread little beauties. I guess it's because I just have a penchant for stories, be they fiction or non-fiction.

I've always inserted a book quota as part of my yearly goals. I did it because I felt that I wasn't reading as much as I should, choosing instead to mope around my room watching Youtube clips of cats or re-reading horrible fanfiction. Every year since 2009, I set a goal number for myself and tried to catch up to that by the end of the year. So I began with one book a month, then added one book for the years to come.

Sadly, this is the first year that I didn't accomplish my book goal. As I mentioned in a previous entry, 2012 was a really trying year for me and I gave myself a lot of leeway for my goals. A good thing though, is that I read books that really made an impact on myself, books that I'm sure I'm going to return to.

This year, I read a really random mix of books, from romance to science fiction to classic to young adult. This was the year I failed my goal, but I don't think that matters as much when I seriously enjoyed a lot of the books that I read.

I'm going to try and comment on the books per month.

Lunch break is the best time for internal debates

And the best time to think is while waiting for your order at Chow King, which will always take at least 2 minutes longer than it should. My packed lunch had a bad taste to it. And I was really looking forward to eating corned beef with potatoes. Siomai and pork chao fan would have to do. 

It's four days into 2013 and I've still not written down my new year goals. Aside from being really lazy, I'm also really confused. Looking back at my goals for 2012 (see latest post!), I realize I'm all over the place when it comes to things I really want to do. I want to refine my writing, particularly my prose. I want to work on my art and explore new mediums. I want to learn more software programs. I want to develop my photography, even with just a point and shoot. I want to marry Takeru Sato (yes that's a legit goal, be quiet). But as I found out last year, it's pretty difficult to juggle all these with everyday life.

Another thing I'm confused about is this blog. Most blogs I go to have some sort of cohesiveness to them, a general sort of theme that sticks the blog together. I don't. Then again, maybe I do, as almost all posts I have made here involve some sort of whining. Lol but srsly. I originally made this blog so I'd have a sort-of art progress blog. As you can see, that failed in the most epic manner. It's turned more into my pensive-thoughts-during-lunch-break blog.

So, should I turn this into my personal blog of random musings and get a new one for my art? Or do I stick it out and wait for it to make sense on its own?

To be frank, I'd rather be a hikkikomori but there's no monies in that.

It's four days into 2013 and I'm still the same, confused daydreamer as I was last year.

Play on.

For the longest time, I was known as the girl with the CD player, then as the girl with the discman, then as the girl with the mp3 player. My earphones are practically glued to my ears. Suffice to say, music has been a huge part of my life.

It's why I decided to make this artsy fartsy typography listing most of the artists I've ever listened to in my entire life. I listen to a lot of genres and in different languages, hence the variety of artists listed. Yes I listened to Britney Spears. Yes, One Direction is there somewhere. I'm not gonna omit them just to look cool lol.

Looking Back

Year-end evaluation!

2012 was a SUPER bad year for me. I don't think I've ever had a year so bad in my entire life. It was as if every month, I had to deal with at least one event filled with utter bullshit. I went through a family death, work troubles, personal troubles, THE WORKS. 

But thankfully, I've stopped counting these things that made my year bad and started taking them in as a collective experience, one that helped me improve as a person who's going to be ready for even more crap that's sure to be slung her way on 2013.

That said, let's take a look at how well I've kept up with my 2012 resolutions!